Monday, November 26, 2007

Sometimes...

Sometimes, being with 40 some relatives for a holiday can remind you of the many relatives you left behind in another country, far away.

Sometimes, having a big feast with all the food you can imagine might remind you of days when you had no food at all and went to bed hungry.

Sometimes, playing out back with your brother can remind you of another brother who you haven't seen in 2 years.

Sometimes, going swimming in an indoor pool with all your cousins can remind you that you are still just learning to swim, as you had never been in water in your life until you were 9 years old.

Sometimes, going to the movies to see a movie where one of the main character dies reminds you of watching your own parents die not so very long ago.

And sometimes, when all of this happens over the course of just a few days, a simple thing like losing a small toy is enough to put you over the edge and send you in tears up to your room where you stay there silent, all day without eating.

Sometimes, it's easy to think this happy healthy child running around with his new family is 'fixed'. But sometimes we need a reminder that the pain and anger is still there. Sometimes, a build up like this helps to get some of that pain and anger out, and to talk about the past, which will always be a huge part of your life. Sometimes you need to work through the pain to talk about and remember those people you have left behind, to make them real again, and remember they will always be a part of who you are.

9 comments:

Courtney said...

So true. Thanks for sharing this. It is precious. We also adopted older children and are in process again. I just posted a very long blog on adopting older children and the challenges.

Heather said...

Thinking of you and Pipo today.
Lots of love,
Heather

patjrsmom said...

This is a thought that is never very far from my mind. Sending hugs and prayers your way.

Jane

Life in Fitzville said...

Thanks guys. Things are actually always better after these episodes. He and Fitz had a midnight snack together, as he hadn't eaten all day. He opened up a lot, and seemed a hundred times better this morning after getting things out.

Kathy said...

Wow. How sad.

Mayhem said...

That sounds so difficult. I'm glad he has parents who understand and can help him in the hard times.

Becky said...

Heartbreaking. My prayers to Pipo and you.
Becky

Cloudscome said...

This is so sad, and hard, and important to remember. Holidays are never simple are they?

Easties and Co. said...

Thank you for sharing this. I learn so much from posts like this. This kind of perspective will help me be a better mom.